Bigfoot Finders, Inc. founder, Wyeth Crestlow, announced that in the next episode of Channel 67’s breakout hit, Where the Fuck is Bigfoot?, viewers will be treated to a special two-hour episode which ends with no sighting of Bigfoot. This is a major change in format from all of the other episodes of the show, which end after one hour – without anything even close to a Bigfoot sighting.
Speaking in hushed whispers from the teacher’s lounge at Womack Elementary School, Creslow declared that “What I feel distinguishes this super special, two-hour episode of Where the Fuck is Bigfoot? from all of the other 154 one-hour episodes where we also found no evidence of a 800 pound, ten foot tall primate – that survives undetected in our grossly overpopulated country, and we now know is immortal given that no bones have ever been found – is the great cliffhanger ending. Did we find Bigfoot? Fuck no. But we’re getting close!”