Ramblings’ Observations from the Car Wash

For some, enlightenment comes from meditation, silent contemplation, religious devotion. Opening the mind to the universe. Feeling the energy that surrounds all of us in this dark, lonely cosmos… Not me. Real truths come to me at the carwash. And here are my latests revelations…

The movie VICE did not have a single hooker in it. And starred old, fat Batman. Very confused.

I saw a Lyrica commercial today. Scared the shit out of me.

There is nothing I am 100% certain about in life… except for the fact that I could beat the crap out of Wolf Blitzer.

The JETS need Rex Ryan back. Fat Rex Ryan. Skinny Rex Ryan was just plain creepy.

I think the comedy in THIS IS US would benefit from a laugh track.

I am deeply upset and ashamed that I drink vodka martinis and not gin martinis. But, it is what it is.

Mothra is going to be a become a huge superstar when GODZILLA: KING OF THE MONSTERS comes out . Hopefully he stays grounded. I couldn’t live with Mothra being an asshole.